Tuesday, August 23, 2016

More "My Summer Car" Greatness

Consider this a supplement to the weekend post, although it might be more accurate to call this an amazing tour de force video to help satiate your 1995 Finland gearheading until the game is released and, if there's any justice in the world, shatters every sales record. Seriously, you can either support something that is legitimately brilliant or keep throwing money at another limp cover-based shooter, at Assassins Creed Part 47: So Very Tired or at EA Sports newest roster update, improved gameplay not included. If you don't support "My Summer Car" you are no longer allowed to complain about the sorry state of mainstream gaming, I'm making it official.

Anyway, the following video is beyond my ability to review, staggering in both length and content, so just watch it. A few highlights to watch for should be quickly mentioned (warning: spoilers). Our heavily accented narrator/game creator is back to guide us through the action and it's relentlessly glorious. We learn that assembling the engine would take two hours even for the genius mind that birthed this modern miracle, so imagine how much messing around with this real world puzzle you'll get to enjoy. The ability to put a crate of beer in the driver's seat and the highly realistic drinking mechanics (you can see your hand!) get showcased. The engine's level of purring is contingent on your skill in constructing it. Other car games like Gran Turismo are just masturbation fantasies and you should save those for "picture of woman" and not internal combustion vehicles. You can totally drive dirt roads in the Suomi of 21 years past. Plus, many other features are on the way!

Just watch it, it may be the best 51 minute experience you can have without getting undesirable diseases. Or as the designer puts it "I am playing and talking." Yes, you are. In the name of all that is good and pure, you sure are.

Bonus Komment Korner 

you should make little kid NPC's driving a suzuki pv and drinking energy drinks

This is realistic god dammit, not a masturbation fantasy

I want your accent inside of me


"There is death in this game. And you will die if you crash hard enough."

Aaron Zehner is the author of "The Foolchild Invention" available in paperback and e-book format. Read free excerpts here and here.

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