More than one billion young people risk damaging their hearing through listening to loud music, the World Health Organization (WHO) said on Friday.
Gigadeaf: The hypothetical loss of hearing in a billion people as a result of a hard music apocalypse.
The WHO estimates that around half of those between the ages of 12 and 35 in middle- and high-income countries are at risk due to unsafe levels of sound on personal audio devices or smartphones.
35 is now considered "young." I feel a lot better. "Turn down that Andrews Sisters record you crazy male-pattern baldness and chronic back pain having punk kid! You'll lose your hearing!"
Also, if your nation is dead broke you're apparently in the clear when it comes to this one particular disaster. I've got some great news for you, South Sudan!
Another 40 percent are at risk from damaging audio levels at concert venues and night clubs.
We're not even getting into the health risks of being busted for dress code at the club or using the public restroom at the concert venue.
"More and more young people are exposed to unsafe levels of sounds. Young people should be aware that once you lose your hearing, it won't come back," said Shelley Chadha, a WHO specialist on hearing impairment.
"What you do in your middle thirties will harm your hearing when you're ninety!"
The vuvuzela, a popular wind instrument used in stadiums during the football World Cup in South Africa in 2010, has a sound intensity of 120 decibels and over nine seconds of exposure could result in irreversible hearing damage.
Remember that? Soccer's gonna get popular here in the U.S.A. any day now, I'm telling you. Hey, come back here!
"It is something we can live without," Chadha said referring to the vuvuzela.
Suggested alternatives include foam cheese-wedges, signs with Bible verses and cow bells.
The use of ear plugs in loud conditions and regular check ups were part of the recommendations as well.
You should do that "raise your hand if you hear a sound" b.s. once every three months, minimum.
WHO: You may listen to it on minimum volume for ten seconds, once a year.
The WHO also wants governments to play a role by imposing strict regulations on noise in public places.
Attention potential dictators: here's a way you can ban free speech under the guise of protecting the public heath!
In addition to noise related causes and ageing, it is also brought on by infectious diseases, genetic conditions, complications at birth, and use of certain drugs.
Yeah, I guess we should have mentioned that, too. But that still leaves 0.001% of cases caused directly by blasting Quiet Riot.
I wish permanent hearing loss to all of them.
Go see Motorhead without earplugs. I made that mistake once. Couldn't hear for a week.
On a positive note, once you're deaf, no more damage to your hearing can occur. Beats the hell out of going blind or dying.
How's that again? Speak up I can't hear you.
Aaron Zehner is the author of "The Foolchild Invention" available in paperback and e-book format. Read free excerpts here and here.