Wednesday, August 6, 2014

News You Can't Use: Subway Trains Fumigated After Bedbugs Found

In New York City when we say "don't let the bedbugs bite" we mean it very literally. We also might warn you about aggressive junkies dressed up as Hello Kitty, rats the size of ponies, underground humaniods that mostly subsist on human flesh and stage shows that are often overrated and fail to deliver the full entertainment value you would expect for the price demanded. Yes, there are a few dangers to living in a city that resembles your "teen hero dystopia" minus the plucky kids, wacky futurist fashions and even the smallest glimmer of hope. The good news is that the fumigators are on the case, so soon the bedbug problem can be downgraded to a mere "subway car interior coated with poison" issue.

The city fumigated three subway trains after bedbugs were spotted on them over the weekend, the MTA says.

New York don't play, sucker. The city itself, not workers or even half-human mole people, went to work on these trains. Three letters were there to comment on it.

All the bedbugs were found on the N line.

Not to be confused with the "Death Wish vigilante" line or the one that takes you right into the throne room of the Mole King whose unfathomable demands are immediately carried out by his blind minions. The "N" will take you to the burning tire district after a few stops in "Gramercy Rifts" territory.

Two trains were taken out of service Sunday after the bugs were found on some cars. A third N train was fumigated Tuesday.

Let me check my fingers. Yup, that would make three.

MTA spokesman Kevin Ortiz wouldn't say where on the trains the bugs were found, nor would he say at which point in the line they were discovered

He also wouldn't comment on the meaning of life, was highly taciturn when asked about those Elmo bullies and didn't having nuttin' to say 'bout living in the world's worst city.

The Daily News reports some of the critters were spotted in seat cushions in train cabs used by conductors and motormen.

Maybe if we referred to the C.H.U.D.s in a cutesy fashion they would seem like less of a problem.

Could bedbug sniffing dogs be the answer?

Ortiz didn't say when the last reported bedbug sighting on a subway train was.
We're in good hands with this "see nothing, say nothing" guy in charge.

Komment Korner  

Wish there was a way to AGREE with your post but not "like" it...

Everything that goes wrong, you blame Obama. You would think he has been in that office for the last millennium

This country is a republic.

What the NYC subways need to fumigated for is to get rid of LIBERALS.

Fumigation won't work---believe me I tried.

Check Out My Books!

Aaron Zehner is the author of "Posts from the Underground," now available in paperback and e-book. Read free excerpts here and here.

His first novel "The Foolchild Invention" is also available in paperback and e-book format. Read free excerpts here and here.

No comments:

Post a Comment