Wednesday, June 26, 2013

News You Can't Use: California Man Faces 13 Years in Jail for Scribbling Anti-bank Messages in Chalk

Punishing the enemies of a bank as harshly as possible is just another example of the freedoms that our heroes fought for in the Spanish-American war or whatever. You don't want to mess with the bank. Somehow having money also seems to attract powerful friends. I know, pretty unbelievable. These friends include crusading messiah-complex judges who will give more prison time for writing "Goldman Sachs Sux" in chalk then for, say, killing someone.

Jeff Olson, the 40-year-old man who is being prosecuted for scrawling anti-megabank messages on sidewalks in water-soluble chalk last year now faces a 13-year jail sentence.

If I ever formed a rap-heavy metal crossover group I'd call it Megabank, or maybe Blingtallica. Seriously, we need to distinguish between the megabank and that mom-and-pop bank in your small town with one location in the feed store and three figures worth of total assets.

A judge has barred his attorney from mentioning freedom of speech during trial.

A judge has realized he can do anything he wants with little, if any, accountability and is now indulging his sick power fantasies, leaving a trail of ruined lives.

Arrested, given show trial where valid defenses were illegal, sentenced to thirty years.

In addition to possibly spending years in jail, Olson will also be held liable for fines of up to $13,000 over the anti-big-bank slogans that were left using washable children's chalk on a sidewalk outside of three San Diego, California branches of Bank of America, the massive conglomerate that received $45 billion in interest-free loans from the US government in 2008-2009 in a bid to keep it solvent after bad bets went south.

Do we really have to keep bringing up that little "we destroyed the economy and possibly civilization with it" mistake? It's that kind of thinking that leads to chalk-wielding monsters who should be locked away forever. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got to take my interest-free loan from the taxpayers and bet it all on "red."

"The State's Vandalism Statute does not mention First Amendment rights," ruled Judge Shore on Tuesday.

A judge truly is a law student who gets to grade his own papers.

Put her in jail!

Upon exiting the courtroom Olson seemed to be in disbelief. "Oh my gosh," he said. "I can't believe this is happening."
OMG, megabanks are, like, so creepy LOL. 

"I've never heard that before, that a court can prohibit an argument of First Amendment rights," said Tosdal.

In unrelated news the novel 1984 is now enjoying a resurgence of popularity in the U.S.A.

Olson continued to protest outside of Bank of America. In February 2012, he came across a box of chalk at a local pharmacy and decided to begin leaving his mark with written statements. "I thought it was a perfect way to get my message out there. Much better than handing out leaflets or holding a sign," says Olson.

Best laid plans, mice and men, etc, etc.

Over the course of the next six months Olson visited the Bank of America branch a few days per week, leaving behind scribbled slogans such as "Stop big banks" and "Stop Bank"

In fairness that website is primarily concerned with selling pesticides and fertilizers to keep the plants inside the bank as healthy as possible.

According to Olson, who spoke with local broadcaster KGTV, one Bank of America branch claimed it had cost $6,000 to clean up the chalk writing.

...and yet there's still a few cranks who worry that all that bailout money was mismanaged. 

Receive government bail-out of freshly printed worthless fiat currency, collect $45 Billion.

On April 15, Deputy City Attorney Paige Hazard contacted Freeman with a response on his persistent queries. "I wanted to let you know that we will be filing 13 counts of vandalism as a result of the incidents you reported," said Hazard.

On tonight's Megabanks of Hazard: Around about that time them Duke boys were etchin' them bank blight messages on a side walk. Well, the Deputy City Attorney was fixin' to get even. Them boys better hope a judge doesn't get as crazy as a run over possum and ban the first amendment...

Komment Korner  

He should just be lucky he wasn't in the tea party, would of been tried for 20 years.

Welcome to America the land of slave.

Cause spray paint and chalk are the same lol. Dumbass.

Here is the judge's email:

$6000 to clean up some chalk? gimme a scrubber and a bucket ill take that bid.

Aaron Zehner's first novel The Foolchild Invention is available in e-book format at and Barnes & Noble.

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