News You Can't Use: Dodger Stadium Flooded with Sewage After Pipe Bursts

Spring is in the air, bringing with it bitter cold, scathing winds that cut to the bone, snow and all the other signs that winter will soon be over. It also means that baseball is back for yet another season of cargo cult reenactments of 19th Century pastoral recreation punctuated by the occasional ball getting mashed by a steroid monster to provide the "excitement" that this amazing sport otherwise has done its best to avoid. However, now it isn't just a "dinger" to wake you up at the ball game, it might be a deluge of foul waste erupting on to the field. Is this some sort of allegory? You can't help but wonder.

A pipe broke at Dodger Stadium Tuesday, flooding the field with sewage and putting a premature end to the final preseason game.

Pitcher holds the ball. Spits. Waits. Looks at first base for awhile. Holds the ball. Here's the pitch. Ball two. It's now one and two. The catcher leisurely throws it back. More waiting. Did I ever tell you the story of how I played in a game that went until 2 am twenty years ago? Really something. Here's the stretch. Steps off the rubber. The manager is coming out. Might be a pitching change. No, I guess not. But wait! Here comes the human waste on the field! It's a flood of pure vileness! The crowd is going wild!

The Dodgers and Angels were facing off in the finale of the preseason Freeway Series when the pipe burst in the bottom of the 5th inning. The Dodgers were up 4-3 at the time.

The real tragedy is now we'll never know who would have "won" an unbelievably meaningless preseason game.

The sewage flooded part of the field. The smell was described as quite powerful as cleanup crews worked to mop up the mess.

If you think your job is hard, imagine being assigned to "mop up" the chunky horror spurting out of a busted sewer pipe.

"It smells really bad, man," one Angels fan in the stands said as he watched the cleanup crew work.

Yeah. I would imagine.

"Look what the Angels brought to us," a Dodgers fan joked in response.

Expect this to be an hilarious joke in the coming remake of "Angels in the Outfield."

Some fans were wondering if it was a bad sign for the season ahead.

As far as omens go it's no dead albatross, but it's not a good sign, either.

Full Article.

Aaron Zehner is the author of "The Foolchild Invention" available in paperback and e-book format. Read free excerpts here and here.