News You Can't Use: San Francisco Sheriff Deputies Charged for 'Fight Club' Duels

Today's bit of worthless current events has a little bit of everything. We've got a headline that confuses deputy gladiator rings with "Fight Club," a mistake you might make if you're culturally illiterate and have also never watched an episode of "Walker: Texas Ranger," leaving a very small demographic indeed. The story itself provides ample grist for whatever political axe you have to grind, from "We're a prison planet, man" gray pony tail onanism to "Look at what the dumbocrats do when they have power" internet commentators and whatever increasingly non-existent moderate middle still remains. The upshot is we're going to break both the first and second rules of Sheriff Deputy Fight Club Gladiator Battles and talk about it in great depth.

Three San Francisco sheriff's deputies were charged with arranging "Fight Club" duels between jail inmates, and one of the deputies made prisoners gamble for food, clothing and bedding, prosecutors said on Tuesday.

The whole point of "Fight Club," was, of course, the struggle for existential meaning and resistance against a soul-killing system, a theme that would have been somewhat undermined if the hero was a prisoner told by Deputy Corruption he'll be fighting for ownership of bedding. Or maybe just throwing dice for bedding, it could be that, too, I guess.

The criminal charges came as newly elected San Francisco Sheriff Vicki Hennessy was implementing jail reforms, such as increased use of video cameras, to prevent such offences.

That new broom sure sweeps clean. We're going to reduce the amount of organized inmate brawls by putting cameras everywhere because this is the closest thing we have to a caring God in today's world.

The two current San Francisco sheriff's deputies and one former deputy were expected to surrender within two days, said Max Szabo, a spokesman for the prosecutors. 

Please turn yourself in so we can severely punish your aberrant behavior. Don't go ruining the honor system for everyone else, all right?

Prosecutors brought the most serious charges against ex-deputy Scott Neu, including assault by an officer, criminal threats and inhumanity to a prisoner. He could be sentenced to 10 years in prison if convicted.   

On today's episode of "Baby's First Bitter Irony" we've got an inherently dehumanizing prison system that's worried about the inhumanities committed by individual officers and to show how serious we are about that we'll make offenders faceless numbers in the same broken system.

On March 5, 2015, Neu pitted two jail inmates against each other, threatening to use a taser gun against them unless they fought, prosecutors said.

Remember when Brad Pitt character did that? What do you mean, "no?" This is just like Fight Club, down to the smallest details.

Thinking they had no choice, the inmates battled and the smaller one hurt his rib, prosecutors said. Chiba is accused of watching the melee and not stopping it.

Let's example the inner thought life of criminal scum forced to cause minor rib damage to appease their heartless captors.

The next day, Neu again forced the pair to fight and this time Jones took part in pitting the two inmates against each other, prosecutors said.

Well, yesterday's fight was a predictable disappointment that failed to satiate my sick blood lust, so let's do it again today and hope for better "action" this time.

Neu's attorney, Harry Stern, said in a statement there was no "fight club".

I'm glad I'm not the only one who doesn't see the connection.

"Deputy Neu allowed two inmates to wrestle to settle a minor dispute. In retrospect, he shouldn’t have. This is the sum and substance of the case," Stern said.

It was simply a club where fights were organized, certainly not a "fight club."

Hennessy, who was elected in November, said the accused deputies were stationed at an outdated jail and the alleged actions occurred under her predecessor, Ross Mirkarimi.

If only there were up-to-date bars and concrete walls everyone would have no doubt conducted themselves with quiet dignity.

Wellington turns out to be a fictional creation of his own mind.

"I'm not going to say it's his fault. What I am going to say is we need to do more there," Hennessy said in a phone interview. 

More tax and spend, the constant solution for unending problems.

District Attorney George Gascón said in a statement that subjecting inmates "to degrading and inhumane treatment makes a mockery of (the) justice system."

Now to get back to ignoring White collar crime.

Full Article.

Komment Korner   

Its a privilege to work in a public employment capacity.

Hey that's a good idea. Fight Clubs

Why oh why do so many non-criminal citizens have little or no trust with LEAs and police officers? Why oh why?

10 years is getting off easy.

San Francisco, that's a liberal stronghold isn't it?

Aaron Zehner is the author of "The Foolchild Invention" available in paperback and e-book format. Read free excerpts here and here.

News You Can't Use: Undercover TV Reports on School Security Raise Ethical Questions

I walk into some building and then announce to a camera crew that if I was a heavily armed lunatic everyone in there would now be dead. This is "investigative reporting" which is both unbelievably valuable to society and a lot more fun for the participants than, say, actually fact-checking stories about world events. But what about the ethics?

The three news reports followed the same format: Television reporters walked into schools with hidden cameras, under the premise of testing the security measures.

I broke the law, but it was for "research" purposes, so I can't be punished. For some reason that defense didn't work when I vandalized a bunch of pinball machines while under the influence of several handfuls of assorted colorful pills. Then again, I wasn't going to do a news report like "Our two remaining national arcades...shockingly vulnerable to goofball abusers!" so that might have been the problem.

Each time, the anchors provided a sobering assessment of the findings.

Well, not literally sobering. In other words don't assume you can drink nine beers, watch an assessment of school security findings and then operate heavy machinery.

“One of the more depressing reports I’ve seen in a long time,” said Matt Lauer, the “Today” show host, after a report showed unsettling lapses in security.

"We can only chalk this up to EastAsia sabotage, Goldstein, and the fact that some people don't love Big Brother enough."

“What we uncovered may shock you,” Chuck Scarborough warned viewers of WNBC in New York.

Or not, assuming you're at all conversant with something we call "reality" and don't expect the average elementary school to be surrounded by guard towers, razor wire, attack animals, proximity mines, etc.

Similarly, an anchor with the NBC affiliate in St. Louis prefaced a story by saying, “Some of it will disturb you.”

"Will there be 'accidental' nudity in the next segment? There's only one way to know for sure...keep watching!"

But these episodes have raised broader questions about the ethical and practical implications of this type of reporting. In some cases, things can go disturbingly wrong.

Or shockingly wrong. Or perhaps even depressingly wrong. Please don't turn us off and start getting your news online like everyone else!

That’s what happened in suburban St. Louis in January when an employee of the news channel KSDK walked into Kirkwood High School unannounced and began to roam the hallways.

"Wooo!!! Now that we're College Freshmen let's visit the old high school and say hi to the teachers! It'll be awesome! Par-tay!!!"

After several minutes, he aroused the suspicion of the school’s office staff.

Aroused. Staff. This is real investigative reporting. Our government is printing trillions in worthless currency, the world is on the brink of a possible nuclear war, there's massive corruption at the highest levels...Gary, we want you to skulk around a high school and see who gets aroused first, you or the people working there.

Soon, the whole school was in lockdown. Police officers rushed to the scene, teachers turned off the lights and crowded students into the corners of their classrooms, and worried parents raced to check on their children.

The land of the free and home of the brave. Nice to see prison culture entering our public schools. Kids, line up in front of the shakedown room. Do that again Timmy and you're going to the hole. Stop sharpening that tooth brush, Betty.

“They certainly didn’t do me any service,” she said. “I have a few more gray hairs because of it, and it terrified my kids and a lot of other kids.”

Reporter pulled a prank. A massive over-reaction occurred. No one learned anything.

Some journalists question whether the news organizations become too much a part of the story, and whether it is dangerous for reporters to wander into schools now that students and staff are often on heightened alert.

"Forget you man, the only reason I spent four years at Columbia studying journalism was so I could wander into local middle schools!"

In tonight's special report I sneak into a junior high and bum cigs from the burn outs. Courage.

“I think that for a news organization to just go on this type of random fishing expedition, there has to be a really good journalistic purpose,” said Bob Steele, a professor of journalism ethics at DePauw University.

Another DePauw snob. Yes, it better be "really" good. I don't think "I wanted to see if they still have that stuffed cougar in the library" counts.

Covertly testing the public defense structure has essentially become a tradition for reporters.

Time for the traditional homecoming week "reporter hide 'n' seek" day. 

After the Sept. 11 attacks, several outlets tried to sneak banned items through airport security lines.

"Now watch as I try to get this sack full of C-4 through the genital-groping station..."

In 2011, a newspaper parked a car at a spot considered potentially vulnerable near the Port Authority bus terminal in New York City, to test the police response.

Basically reporters are irresponsible douche bags. Sorry if we keep dancing around that truth with endless anecdotes instead of just saying it.

In Fargo, N.D., a correspondent who entered a school clandestinely in December was investigated for trespassing but avoided charges when her station agreed to keep her away from school-related news coverage for 90 days. 

I honestly expected this paragraph to end with the reporter going through a wood chipper.

“I don’t know how you see what the truth is if you don’t go in that way,” Ms. Wallace said, referring to the hidden camera technique. “The moment you show up with a big camera, things look a lot better.”

It's not how big your camera is, it's how well you frame your shots.

Also: "Hey everyone! The giant camera is here! Man, this situation sure looks better!"

“What happens is you’re spending all this energy and time investigating school safety when that’s already the single safest place for your child anyway,” he said, adding that this “sort of reaffirms the false notion that my kids are really in danger at school when they’re not.”

If you ignore the communist indoctrination, the drugs, the sex, the gladiator training and so on, it really is the best place for your children. Better than leaving them in a junk yard for eight hours, for example.

For instance, he asked, what if wandering into a school caused such alarm that the school security officer pulled out a gun? How would the reporter react in such a situation?

Would the reporter feel lucky? Well, would he or she?

“Is it O.K. for them to set a fire and see how fast the fire department responds?” he asked. “It’s a safety issue. It’s not responsible. It’s the wrong way to do it.”

Please, don't give them any ideas.

Full Article.

Shill Section

Aaron Zehner is the author of "Posts from the Underground," now available in paperback and e-book. Read a free excerpt here.

His first novel The Foolchild Invention is also available in paperback and e-book format. Read free excerpts here and here.